Sunday, January 19, 2014

oh Capri

Today a friend reminded me of the song that we named Capri after ..

"And oh when she'll open her eyes,
There'll be no surprise
That she'll grow to be
So beautifully
Just like her mother
That's carrying.
Oh, Capri, She's beauty
There is an angel growin' peacefully.
Oh, Capri, Sweet baby.
And things will be hard at times...
but I've learned to try just listening
Patiently.
Oh, Capri, Sweet Baby.
Oh, Capri, you're beauty
Just like your mother
That's carrying...Oh, Capri."
 
Its been so hard waiting for Capri to open her eyes and to get better.  I read these lyrics and just began to cry.  Things are hard right now.  Harder then they have ever been.   I need to take a breath and remember that things are going to be okay, day after day she is going to get better.  We are going to be okay.
 
The kids flew home with my parents today.  Baylee has a fever and doesn't feel good.  Ashton cried the whole way to the taxi and repeatedly told me that he promised to be good and he didn't need to go to the play area, he promised to just sit in Capris room quietly.  When I told him he would have so much more fun with grandma and grandpa he asked me why I loved Capri so much more than him or bay.  I just want to be their for all of them.  I want to hold each of them and tell them that its going to be okay.  When does this helpless feeling go away? When will things feel normal again?