Wednesday, July 3, 2013

Strength of a sister

Sitting.  Talking.  Waiting.  Nurses. Visitors.  Sitting. Waiting.  Hoping. Waiting. 

For any of you who have been in the hospital for any extended period of time know the tedious schedule of sitting in a hospital room.  This post is from my perspective as Kendra's sister.  By now you all know the back story of how we came to find out about Capri health condition.   What you may not know is the great support and love of family and friends that mike and Kendra have.   With a phone call our mom was in the car and driving the 7 hour drive to be with Kendra without a second thought.  We have a pretty amazing mom who would move heaven and earth to do anything to help her children.  And an extremely supportive dad who is always willing to let his only employee leave at the drop of a hat to do so.  My girls and I drove the 12 hour trip later that evening to be with Kendra and mike.  Followed shortly by our brother taking time off work to be with them and help where needed.

Since we have been here the love for them has been overwhelming.  I wish I had a picture to show what her room looked like.  Pictures drawn and painted by her son and daughter and nieces  cover the walls and the back of the door.  Picture frames of her two babies sit right at the foot of the bed. Flowers line all the shelves and make the room smell like lilies, gifts of magazines, food baskets, teddy bears also line the room.  As we've sat in there for the last week the visits from all of mikes family, friends, neighbors, old coworkers, current co workers, it's been amazing to see the love that people have for them.

Growing up Kendra was always the fun loving one, lighthearted, didn't take life or things too seriously, or think to far ahead into the future, but then again I was always serious enough for the both of us.  I was the follow the rules, do as youre told kind of kid.  The grownup one.  This last week has shown me how wrong I've been and how when it comes to serious matters she is more adult than I will ever be.   As we've sat in consults with pediatric cardiologists and high risk OBs talking about percentages of survival and bleak outlooks, I sit in the room across from her watching as she asks the hard questions, facing life and death with the compassion and tenderness of a mother and the finesse and matter of factness of someone much older than 27.  As I sit in my corner wanting to cry choking back tears to stay tough for everyone else, and for her, she has to make decisions about life support, burial options, quality of life, and other topics that I wouldn't be able to handle or think about without sobbing.

I'm amazed at what a gentle yet tough sister I have.  Her strength through all of this while she is dealing with so many emotions and feelings inside, while outwardly she shows so much strength and courage.  

And while she is strong and so is her husband mike, the financial burden of things is starting to escalate.  We have had many emails, messages, and calls offering support and we haven't known what to say or do.  We recently found out about a support page where people that have offered support to help lessen the burden of the costs of specialty doctors, hospitals, hotels can donate to help them.   I felt I should share I here as this is where most of get your information on baby Capri and how things are going.  I won't hijack her blog again but wanted to share a little of my thoughts and the link or those of you that have asked and were wanting to help.  Staying strong and hoping for a miracle, love you Kendra and Mike and baby Capri!

Auntie Tandy